medusasstory:

kendrasaunders:

so in honor of scott summers dying (he’ll be fine) here’s what happens when x men “"kills”“ emma frost who will, in this case, also be fine, as dying is to x men as breathing is to the rest of us

emma as she’s dying: ororo. ororo listen to me. i have dinner reservations at that one place in paris. you have to make them two years in advance. do NOT cancel my reservation. i will be FINE. whatever happens, the reservation STAYS

scott was genuinely upset as emma was dying and he was crying over her and was like no emma dont leave me and emma, in a mocking voice, like “no emma dont leave me listen to yourself i’ll be back in six months shut up idiot”

ororo: her last words were “is jean also dead? good.” and then she died

emma’s funeral, which is just held at the hellfire club, is just all portraits of emma. especially the nudes. its nothing but nudes. it’s how she wanted to be remembered
ororo reading the pre-written eulogy emma wrote for her: emma grace frost was the most kind, beautiful, charming soul on this planet.
 pietro: raises hand 
ororo: she wrote this

pietro: lowers hand

she wanted me to tell you all she died doing something interesting, like riding an extremely expensive and rare horse, and not doing, in her words, “something stupid like saving the entire team.” which is, of course, what she did. that being said, here is the picture of the very expensive horse she wanted to show all of you, to remind everyone that she was rich, so very rich, and you are not

emma returning from the dead 7 months later strolling into the mansion and announcing I HAVE NOTES ON HOW WE CAN IMPROVE MY FUNERAL

logan: how was hell
emma: boring and overrated
logan: satan kicked you out didnt he
emma: that’s not the point

@kemendraugh

My Library Collections Professor Has Made A Terrible Mistake

medusasstory:

teaandspite:

teaandspite:

She doesn’t know it yet, but she will soon. You see, the midterm paper on calls for students to write a collection evaluation for a library of our choosing. Now, I know that when she said that library does not need to be real, she meant that we didn’t need to pick a specific one. But what I heard was… 

For those of you requesting the full paper, I’ll see what I can do once I get the grade back!

I’M SO GLAD YOU ASKED

For the sake of this evaluation, only the official, present collection of the Unseen University will be examined. Collections belonging to other libraries that are accessible via L-Space will be considered as part of the Interlibrary Loan System, as will materials available by time-travel and other such means.

Relatedly:

Whether or not acquiring books that have not yet been written is a violation of copyright law has yet to be legally clarified, but faculty and students should not expect to be permitted to cite them in their own work (see also Library Rule 3: Do Not Interfere With The Nature Of Causality). 

@kemendraugh

This Vote Is Legally Binding

tkingfisher:

In response to all those articles about talking to women with headphones…

Someone always says it, whenever it comes up:
“I guess I’m just not allowed to talk to anyone any more!”

Well.
Yes.
It is my duty to inform you that we took a vote
all us women
and determined that you are not allowed to talk to anyone
ever again.

This vote is legally binding.

Yes, of course, all women know each other,
the way you always suspected.
(Incidentally, so do Canadians. I’m just throwing that out there.)
We went into the women’s room at the Applebee’s at the corner of 54
and all the others streamed in through the doors
into that endless liminal space,
a chain of humans stretching backward
heavy skulled Neanderthal women laughing with New York socialites,
Lucille Ball hand in hand with the Taung child.
We sat around in the couches in the women’s room
(I know you’ve always been suspicious of those couches)
and chatted with each other in the secret female language
that you always knew existed.
Somebody set up a console–
the Empress Wu is ruthless at Mario Kart
and Cleopatra never learned to lose
and a woman who ruled an empire that fell
when the Sea People came
and left no trace
can use the blue shell like a surgical instrument.

Eventually we took the vote.
You had three defenders:
your grandmother and your first-grade teacher
and an Albanian nun who believes the best of everybody.
Your mom abstained.
It was duly recorded in the secret notebooks
that have been kept under the couch in the Applebee’s
since the beginning of recorded time.
And then we went back to playing Mario Kart
and Hoelun took off her bra
and we didn’t think about you again
except that I had to carry this message.

So anyway
good luck with that
it’s just as you always said it was.
Hush now,
no talking

hush.